* jazzyhands *

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Something that annoys me when I go swimming, apart from people standing around in the lap lanes (earth to stationary people, it's called a swimming pool not a standing pool) is people who swim in the slow lane when they aren't slow swimmers.

I will just be getting into a Zen-like state, arms and legs, body, mind and soul all in harmony with the water, one perfect seamless motion, when some speedy idiot splashes past me ruining it all.

Of course I am extra slow especially when I am doing my breast stroke with kickboard swimming. I putt along with barely discernable frog kicks but content myself with knowing that enough of these and one day I will be able to kill a man with just my thighs. Not that I want to kill a man that way but it would be so good to know I could if I wanted to. In the meantime I might suggest a new lane. A "she's slow, but she sure is plucky" lane, maybe.

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