* jazzyhands *

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::1.8.05:: Men!

I haven't posted about internet dating in a while, mostly because I haven't been internet dating. but I still keep my profile up on some sites.

So...

About a week or two ago, I got an email from a guy that sounded promising. I emailed him back then he emailed me. The usual story. Then he sent an email with a long list of questions. I read it but didn't answer it immediately because I didn't have the time. Two days later, I sat down to answer and I'd received another email from him. An email demanding to know why I hadn't answered his previous email.

Okay, so I answered, explaining that I'd been busy and hadn't had time to get back to him. That day I got another email with a very patronising reprimand about my lag in responding. I was pretty damn angry, let me tell you. Apparently email ettiquette demands that if you aren't going to answer an email immediately, you email to let the other person know. Well, excuse me.

I wasn't sure what to do. I mean if this was how he acted after three emails, imagine going out with this guy... a real barrel of laughs.

The thing is, I have this fear in the back of my mind that if I say the wrong thing in these situations the guy will get really angry with me and there will be consequences. My first thought is to avoid making them angry. Weird, huh?

Then I thought about it. For starters, this dude has no concern about pissing me off. Secondly, he doesn't even know my real name. And last, but way not least, why the hell shouldn't I tell this guy to fuck off? Seriously, I don't have to email, talk to, go out with or do anything with any guy if I don't want to. I have no obligation to someone after a few emails and if he can't handle that then that is his problem.

I think guys use this fear sometimes to make women, especially me, do unwise and wimpy things. Well no more. I am going to be stronger and more assertive. What do I have to lose? A couple of dates with big knobjockey jerks, that's what.

From now on, any man that wants me (and sure there isn't exactly a queue around the block) will have to win me. Flowers graciously accepted.

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Comments:

ABSOLUTELY this guy deserves the take a hike response. A "where are you?" e-mail because you didn't respond is one thing... a "how dare you?" from someone that is trying to begin a friendship, relationship, or whatever-it-may-lead-to-ship is ridiculous.

# posted by Anonymous : 3:50 am

I sometimes forget about people's "personalities", I get so used to my close and adorable circle of friends, and when something like this happens, as we have found on AMM, it hits you, yeah the world is full of problematically displaced fuckheads.

On AMM recently some guy, half a couple, was chatting to my other half, and boy did he eventually piss her off. We had agreed that we might call them to come around for a "meet & greet", then on MSN he wrote that it would have been nice if we had called to let them know we weren't going 'round. Hadn't we said "WE MIGHT CALL"?!!!! What a tosser, I eventually sent him a polite email telling him I was an "arty, bookish type" - how else could I describe myself - and he was a sporty football loving hotted up car type - there was going to be no match.

Then his partner emailed us saying she couldn't understand our reason because we hadn't chatted with her yet, but for god sake, your partner is one step away from doing cave-paintings, what does that say about her? Anyway, internet nasties, use "Moreteen - zap those internet nasties and replace them with countless pop-ups promoting Frat Party Drunk College Teen Sex Whores, because frankly, it's less annoying".

rups

# posted by Anonymous : 9:34 am

See, because you're doing this online, you can filter out nutcases like this guy. Don't even bother replying.

# posted by Violet : 9:41 am

rupert... I don't know about these people. They think they can bully you into having sex with me then wonder why they can't score?

violet... I was going to ignore it. That's what I'd normally do but I thought bugger it. I wanted to tell him just how he'd pissed me off.

ps. got a sucky email from him today but too little, too late.

# posted by Kathryn : 9:45 pm

A while back I met an internet date for coffee. He was tall, quite attractive, sane and totally boring. There was no chemistry there at all. After about an hour of talking (mostly me - I was buzzing off the caffeine) I politely made my farewells and left. He emailed me several times, I responded politely enough (or so I thought) but did not give him any encouragement at all re further dates. Imagine my suprise when he emailed me to tell me he was no longer going to be in contact with me as he was "pursuing another woman" he had met online. To use his words "She's not as interesting as you but at least she has shown some interest in me." WTF? I was speechless. I didn't bother replying to that email and was quite happy not to hear from him. Until about a couple of months later when he emailed me again, suggesting we "hook up" and hoping that I wasn't "angry" with him. Obviously things hadn't gone so well with the other "less interesing woman"..prat...It was then I learnt that you do actually have to say "Fuck Off" as "Thanks, but No Thanks" apparently isn't succinct enough.

# posted by Ozfemme : 11:52 am

Heya, I need to get in contact with you, but cannae find your e addy. can you drop me a line @ melbournehumanfemale at hotmail dot com when you have the chance? It's not urgent but I will be sending out terse comments every hour till I hear from you. It's only fair, you know. xo

# posted by Desci : 11:56 am

Jeez, what a douche. You're right to give him the hike.

Imagine what a date with him would be like!

# posted by Anonymous : 11:26 pm