On the weekend I went wedding dress shopping. No, not because some mysterious and gorgeous man has swept me off my feet with promises of love, honor and hot sex. I was the support person for a friend (ie. not bridemaid, thank god, but the bridesman lives overseas so I went along).
Because of my total and utter undesirability, I've avoided anything bridal thus far in my life. It's a whole other world out there, folks. A strange and scary world.
First off, you need an appoinment at most places. Because the wedding dresses are so busy out partying and having a good time they can't see you unless they know you are coming. Or maybe it's so the bridal frock shop owner can concentrate on giving you the hard sell.
So we got to Yarraville but couldn't see the dresses. We pressed our noses to the shop window to sneak a peek then decided brunch would be a better idea.
Back in the city, we went to another shop. One for which you do not need an appointment. The dresses hung in rows and rows all in plastic covers. Let's face, plastic wrapped white phoofy things all look the same. So we waited for one of the saleswoman to be ready to see us. Sharletta didn't seem to interested in us once she found out we weren't ready to lay down the cold, hard cash on the spot still my friend managed to find a few frocks to try on. They all looked big and white and shiny.
Once Sharletta dismissed us, we thought maybe we'd look through pattern books at Lincraft - getting something made would be a cheaper option. My friend didn't like any of the patterns. I still don't see why she so easily cast aside the mini-at-the-front, train-at-the-back option. I guess she doesn't have my legs.
Next stop was the Mariana Hardwick clearance shop in Fitzroy. A few more dresses were tried and dismissed. It was there I found my dream dress. A black Victorian frock in purple complete with bustle with a black lace jacket/sleeves type thing over the top. It was only $5000. I think I need it. Sure I have no plans to get hitched in the near future but I could wear it for other things - cleaning the house, going to get the mail, drinkings with Sugar Lips.
We headed around to the front, non-clearance, part of the shop were we could look at the dresses without an appointment but couldn't try them on. It was a veritable salon for nuptual-clad females. And there we found the first dress. For only $4,000. Yeah the price of an overseas holiday or a secondhand car. We are going back next weekend so my friend can have a fitting.
So now I know more than I ever wanted to know about the innumerable shades of white and about petticoats and about beading. I have yet to fit out what delustred satin actually is but I'm sure I'll find out over the next few weeks.